the dreaming Press.

Do what you love!

Bees buzzed about and hung heavily on purple thistle nearby as if watching me and what I was up to photographing this treasured shell and picture of my late Grandfather. The day was humid and I was out walking with my journals and my camera and wanted to get this shot in the wood near my house before it was time to head back home. I had done all of the tasks required of my day so I was sneaking in some fun before I had to pick up my children.

I'm sure my ideal day would be just like this; walking around shooting film or digital with just nature and a good mood for company. I've been thinking a lot about how I spend my time. I would love to be more wise when it comes to the how I spend it. So I'm pursuing my love. Photography. Hence I stuck my neck out recently while out for dinner at a beautiful and delicious new local restaurant...met a fabulous lady who was looking for a photographer to shoot an evening event and I took the chance and offered my services and now...

...I've been chosen along with another photographer to shoot a local event and this is causing me some anxiety. As you all know, I shoot for fun. This event in September however, is a real job. With expectations attached to it. {Yikes.}

I will put my heart and soul and passion into it, but there is a little voice inside my head already that is saying, They've hired a professional. What do you think YOU are doing? Do you think you are qualified to do this? Are you like, freakin' nuts or something? Ah I do so wish that little voice would be quiet. Have you ever attempted something bigger than you think you can handle? If so, how did you do it without completely losing faith in yourself? Do share, as I can use all the encouragement you can spare please. I know I'm not the only self taught photographer out there. Am I?

I'm taking the chance. You never know unless you take the chance. Wish me luck! xo {I'll share some of my work here with you when the time comes...}

pulpy orange juice, a trip to the farm & *stores* of smores

My husband accidently bought orange juice with pulp yesterday and I'm overjoyed! It is my favourite and I'm the only one in the family who likes it so I suppose it will be all mine. If I had my way I'd peel the skin off an orange, put it in the blender and make a puree out of it. That would be my ideal orange juice. Yes, I do eat whole oranges, they are like bursting sun fruits, so delicious.

Hmmm let's see...three things to bring on vacation:

Jumbo jet puffed marshmallows....check.

Milk chocolate bars of varying brands....check.

Graham crackers....check. {I suppose my packing is nearly complete, just a bikini and I'll be all packed.}

Here is my new favourite Adele song...isn't she the best thing since...Mumford & Sons?

The photos above were all taken on the farm today (except the windowsill daisies) with my iPhone and layered apps (for those of you who don't use an iPhone camera...the apps work in a similar fashion on your photos to those Photoshop actions that those who don't know how to use Photoshop use). I've been studying CS4 (Creative Suite 4, Photoshop) lately and I'm loving it...I like to know what actually happens to my photo when I manipulate various things on it.

Will you take a vacation with your family this summer? Where will you go if you do? xoxo

intoxicating expression and the art of *seeing*

 
Well, well, well.  I found a delightful little book!  Summer is my season to get down and dirty with a stack of books so...I went out in search of a few titles. Some came my way by chance also from my mother (love her SO!) and some just magically fell into my hands once I spied them on the shelf, as a magnet is drawn to steel. {pick me! pick me! they seem to whisper}

So delightful is the one book I chose in fact, that I read it nearly cover to cover yesterday and it was full of intoxicating goodness; words as wine upon the lips.  It is Photography and the Art of Seeing: A visual perception workshop for film and digital photography  by Freeman Patterson.  A must read for any creative person.  As this book wakes you up not only to the creative potential in your photography but would do the same for any avenue in your life as an artist or otherwise.  There is a zen about this book that I just drank up. This is but one of quite a few the author wrote so I plan to load up on them all.  'Cause it's a season to be intoxicated with wisdom, words, wine & spirit.

Speaking of intoxication; WOW to this photo (aptly named The Dreaming, coincidence I assure you...!).  I'm happy to have stumbled across this gentleman's flickr stream.  I always wonder what treasures lie in flickr, and this is such a gem.  Colin Vincent you are a genius.

Photography is expression, so when done with soul and passion that will shine through.  I believe that with everything that I am and over a plate of lime toast and coconut coffee this morning I perused another form of expression...that which I found in my friend Patty's blog-"inside the makeup case".  This woman has impeccable makeup everyday, she rocks the wildest colours and coolest ideas you've ever seen on a face and makes it look perfect.  She is "whiplashes" on Instagram so give her a follow.  She's not just a pretty face; she's a photographer too. (p.s. Patty and I met in esthetic school and she had a different colour of perfect polish on her nails everyday.)

Oh how could I leave out a crazy fun evening at the spa we have coming up? I almost forgot...Firefly Creative Writing is coming July 12 to Dance That Pen! This is a sweet little workshop for women who want a juicy date with their creative side. Together, we’ll create a fun, inspiring space to fill pages with words — tiny stories and micro-memories, rants and letters and questions. Come expecting to laugh, share, surprise yourself, and support others on their own unique creative paths! If you are in the Toronto area and wish to sign up for this event, simple click the above link and follow the trail of breadcrumbs.  We'll have a howling good time with Chris Kay Fraser she's a crazy gal! She'll help us get intoxicated with wicked words and wonderful stories...we all have them inside so let's get them out.

With so much intoxicating goodness from the buzzing bees outside my window to the carafe of wine decanting for tonight's supper, I'll leave you with a song that will surely lull you into a deep summer complacency. 

SEE with your eyes, express yourself through your life be that with a camera in your hand, a pen or a makeup brush.  Refuse to stop seeing and start expressing.

xoxo

*photo of my young daughter running taken by me yesterday afternoon during a game of Man on the Moon ;)

reach for new heights~

 

 Christine Mason Miller's bejewelled wrist & graceful hand. Photo taken earlier this year in Petra, as part of Tara Bradford's Journey To Jordan photography trip.

These last couple of days my heart strings have been tugged on quite a bit.  I've welled up.  I've teared up.  I've sniffled a few times.  A few people have really cracked me open.  Wide open. I wish to thank them for that. They make me long to reach for new heights, stretch myself further, go the distance with my life. Read and see if you agree with me, I'm sure you will.

First, Relyn.  Relyn blogs at Come Sit By My Fire.  She posted a list of prudent advice for her daughter Sloane.  Go read it, you'll want to print it out and share it with your daughters, your sons, and your best friends.  Relyn has a warm heart and always blogs her personal truths.  She has been one of my biggest inspirations.

Second, a woman I don't even know.  At all.  But my mother knew her.  My friend Maithri knew her.  Here is her blog.  She recently passed on but left such a glowing legacy I had to share her with you.  She will gobsmack you with how richly she lived her life.  Go read, go cry.  Go be envious like I was.  Leave her space wanting to reach a little higher.  Thank you Tessa, for your inspirations.  I know your words will continue to ignite a living passion in others like wildfire.

Thirdly, and I say this with a lump in my throat.  Life is fleeting.  Life is beautiful.  Cherish those you love and hold them dear.  For it is but a blink in the twinkly night sky.  Blessed are we who have known the love of a most wonderful mother.  If you still have yours close, make sure you tell her how much she means to you today.

Okay, had to get that out there.  Life isn't always bowls of cherries ya know! If anyone has extra, or is feeling inspired to help, please check out my friend Maithri's organization to see where you fit in.  Who knows, I may bump into you in Swaziland one of these days.  Tessa donated proceeds from her art to PDI, it was a cause that touched her heart.

xoxo

Gillian

p.s. i love you :)

Fun is a many-splendored thing.

 
It is finally Labour Day weekend and it's just in time.  I think I may have collapsed otherwise. I really love long weekends but this one in particular.  It is my favourite time of year. I will take my youngest to the farmer's market on Saturday.  {The eldest is on a road trip to visit a friend of hers who moved far far away.}

Wheat-berry salad and a salmon bbq'd on a cedar plank is on the menu for one of the nights. I'll read, "The Help", by Kathryn Stockett.  I'll sleep.  A nap here, and there. I'll start my fall "nesting" process.  I'll hit a thrift store.  I'll go buy a new tunic. 

I hope you enjoy your long weekend too, whatever you end up doing-enjoy it all! See you next week!

xo 

xoxo

The charmingest of balconies.

I captured this on my phone the other day while walking through The Beach area of Toronto, my friend Christina and I walked "The Underwear Affair" and our team of two kicked proverbial ass.  Indeed we did. 

I stalled briefly after accidently turning my phone off, I wanted a picture of a yellow front door that I saw...I have a thing for them because my front door is yellow.  Yellow doors are the happiest of doors to go through, you see.  But when my phone gave me a hard time, I gave up and we completed our walk amidst all the jiggly and some not so jiggly buns out walking for the same cause. I never got the picture. 

But the neighbourhood we saw on our walk was so cute, charming and full of life.  There was even a fat ginger cat sunning himself out on a dangerous ledge without a care in the world. It was Christina who noticed him, "Look at that cat!" she said laughing.

As we passed the homes, which we both fell in love with...I wondered to myself, who lives here? You know me, whenever I walk by charming cosy homes I'm just itching to walk up and bang on the front door...invite them out on to the porch to chat.  Small talk I think would work well.  Then we'd progress to something a little deeper, a little more meaningful.  I wondered what music was in the cd player here at this home, the one with the most charmingest of balconies? 

Do they listen to the Rolling Stones?

Do they smoke shisha?

Do they tuck or untuck? (Shirts and bedsheets) 

Do they feel happy or sad?

Favourite colour? Smell? Feeling?

How are things at work?

Are they in love????

Are they truly living?

I walked along with my friend, and wondered how she was coping.  You see we were walking in memory of her boyfriend, who she had lost in April of this year to cancer.  I feel for her going through this journey as she herself tries to live again.  She is the bravest and sweetest girl you could ever meet.  I looked back to myself at her age, and I had been with Julian already nearly three years.  Which is precisely the amount of time Christina had with Jake.  Several times while walking I had a lump in my throat.  Theirs was true love, cut short.  I'm usually pretty Zen about the cycles of life and death but I do not hesitate to tell you that they were both royally ripped off. 

Now I don't know about the charming home with the balcony, whether they listen to the Stones or not.  But Jake and Christina did.  She told me their song.  In particular, the line they shared: wild horses, we'll ride them someday.

Go live while you are alive. Sieze every opportunity, kiss everyone you love and tell them so, and please don't forget to listen to the Rolling Stones. 

xoxo

Did I dream you dreamed about me?

 

I sit watching a monarch caterpillar molt.  The fourth instar.  It is exciting and magical to me.  My family thinks I've lost it.  I sit and watch.  They fascinate me, Frida and Guadalupe-the two that remain. (Petunia went to live with my friend, so her little ones could see the miracle too.)

I worry about Guadalupe.  I've read that some caterpillars have incomplete molts which result in the old skin becoming too tight for the growing caterpillar.    Some break free. Yet some don't make it, they die. Some struggle for hours and manage to shed the old skin.  My caterpillar is struggling right now.  Lupe is thrashing around on a milkweed leaf desperate to shed the last ring of skin around her little body.  It would ordinarily be a tendency of mine to reach in, gently pick up the caterpillar and help it out.  Still sadly enough I realize that I cannot do this.  If I do that then I interfere with nature's plan, and I mustn't mess with nature so I helplessly sit and watch-whispering words of encouragment to her to give it all she has got. Kind of like an unseen and unheard angel may cheer you or I on. 

So you know me, here I go projecting again. And the little caterpillar becomes a microcosm of my own world reflected back at me.  I'm breaking loose from the old restrictive beliefs, attitudes and ways I've crafted over the years-the same way Lupe is breaking out of her old restrictive exoskeleton.  I'm transforming myself into the person I truly wish to be. {For you see it is my deepest wish to manifest the greatest me I can manifest, and there is a grand plan at work in my life right now for me to do just that.}  And I see all of this in the struggles of a tiny sweet caterpillar.

This evening in dreamland I'll drift off with a wish and a prayer, that when I wake tomorrow Lupe is free of her old skin. (I'll wish and pray for myself too, why not?) 

Keep your fingers crossed for little Lupe.  Would you mind? One day she could fly all the way to Mexico.

xo

Lemon yellow tea set.

Going after work to buy a lemon yellow vintage tea set.  If it hasn't sold.  Should have bought it the first time I picked it up, silly me.  But I was thinking, 'if I still love it tomorrow, I'll come back for it."

{I will need a silver Moroccan tray to display it on.} 

I'm bringing home some roses too, red ones for the garden.  (I have to start somewhere...)

Enjoy your weekend plans, whatever they are...I will be stencilling gold mandalas on my walls-drinking lemonade-listening to music-and writing.  xo

Living future nostalgias, a lesson from the boy who wears odd socks.

What do you truly savour about your life?

Could it be your career? Friends? Travel? Food? Sleeping in? Loved ones? Ice cream??? {For me, tiger tail on a sugar cone. Plain and simple.  There will never be another flavour invented in the Universe to me, that comes close to rivaling tiger tail.}

Are you focused on any one particular thing, or do you invite in a synchronized swimming chorus of singing prose to help you backstroke amidst the rivers of colour delivered up faithfully to you each day? Do you sway to the tidal rhythms of your ashes to ashes existence? Do you obey your intuition regardless of what your brain tells you are potential hazards? {Remember the brain is bullshit and the tummy is truth...listen to your tummy, easy peasy lemon squeezy.} Are your nights lit by a loving moon full of promise holding dreams? Are you fully embracing your ideas without shooing them away because you are strong and wise and don't let obstacles get in your way because you don't even entertain the idea of an obstacle?

Then I say good for you!  Keep savouring, keep reaping what you sow, and may the karma of what you share come back to you a thousand fold.

Not that I'm suggesting life is without sorrows, in fact sometimes quite the opposite.  I think so much about the colour of life lately and how it has desaturated for some important people in my life.  I am not suggesting we all walk around in a "rosy glasses"-induced fog, but could we strive to savour the nows that are so generously dealt to us?  My friends who hurt remind me every day to embrace the ones I love, for just loving them and being present when they need me is such a tremendous gift that I am so amazed at the wonders it can do for them.  In fact being present is the greatest gift you can give that allows you to reap all the benefits too. 

And guess what? That is all we can do.  (Our best.) That is it.  Be present.

Live your future nostalgia's. The boy who introduced me to the concept is a world traveler, a teacher, and a lover of photography, art, life, and last but most certainly not least a lover of great music.   We can all learn from him, right?  Be available with your full attention wherever you are.  Easy.  Simple.  We have to live in this imperfect world but we can do wonders for our happiness level if we focus on the things and people that bring us joy.  The rest isn't up to us, only our choices and our reactions are.

So, enjoy your ice cream and stop bitching about your neighbour.  You are wasting your time and you are likely making yourself ill. Instead, I beg of you to attack your life like the greatest challenge that has ever been issued, and float like a butterfly, sting like a bee. (Need a visual? Get in the ring with life.  Lace up your gloves and start to dance....POW.  Deliver a punch.  Then keep delivering punches while dancing...claim your title. Ahhh, good match at the end of the road.  You'll be able to bow and thank your opponent.  Once he wakes from his knock out that is...)

Be free, be generous. Eat more ice cream. Get busy making nostalgic things happen.

xo

It dawned on me, there is no such thing as time.

Inside an old church they are restoring at the Citadel, Amman, Jordan. March 2010

I had the pleasure of meeting a fabulous woman through a vibrant and funny friend of mine the other day.  Powerful ideas and gifts were exchanged; simply through animated and open conversation.

I have to say I attract in the most brilliant and gifted people.  I'm so very lucky. Now as a result of this meeting, great things are going to happen!  Isn't life a gift? I'm so jazzed about it, that I'm scribbling notes..ideas..and thoughts quicker than my hand can write.

I sat in a "reflection" park today, amidst the flowers, underneath a giant pine tree that was strung with fairy lights and words carved in stone set randomly about {empathy, responsibility, integrity...}...and I simply journalled to my heart's content.  Don't you just love it when ideas flow through you like that, as though you were some divine vessel of the Universe itself?  Wait, I am a divine vessel through which the Universe speaks.  So are you!  You already knew that, I hope.

I love my little journal, it is from a small press and was a gift from a friend. In there I have story ideas, lists of things I need....BlackBerry...Macbook Air....paper lanterns...purple candles...cardamom tealights...white roses...you get the idea.  It is also full of reminders and poetry and quotes.  Journals are chunks of life in a small contained space.  Microcosm's if you will.

I'll leave you now with the most beautiful thought which I will get to after I set the scene; for 33 years I've had a close friend and just recently her classy and caring mother passed away quite suddenly.  We did the most incredibly honourable thing- we wildly scattered her ashes in a private lake side ceremony that was replete with skipping stones, picking flowers and reading poetry while mourning doves cooed at us directly overhead in the old tree by the water.  Children chased frogs, we cried and remembered, and suddenly I felt that there is no such thing as time. I was seven years old again, in the company of this funny and wonderful friend of mine. It is enchanting how symbolic it is to set someone free to the four winds, up the ashes fly and then they indeed scatter in the wind, very mystically. After a deep breath, "Mum go be free!" my friend cried, as she threw the ashes into the air.  Then later, "She would have loved that," my friend tells me.  I agreed.

Funny how a sad time can connect people together in such a poignant way. I felt so happy and honoured to have been included in their sacred and private occasion. To them I say...thank you. To you I say, that is all for today. xo